Semi-Meaningful Musing: Being Part of a Unit and Remaining True to Myself

It's official, I am part of a unit.  Being married is kinda weird sometimes.

We now share the same surname.

We spend a lot of time together as a result of living together (and we know there is no where else to go).

We constantly get questions about how the other is doing when other people don't see us together.

We are now introduced as each other's partner.

People we know think of us in the same together - as a package.  I've been pondering this in newlywed life.  On the one hand, it is awesome that we are perceived as life partners not only in each other's eyes, but other people's as well.  We are just the beginning, the foundation, of our own family.  We are each other's biggest supporters and confidantes (besides our own besties of course because I think one can have the life partner and a separate best friend(s)).

But I'm also afraid, not least of all in images like this.

I now have to tell Mr. Gadget if I wanted to plan a last minute trip to Paris (and possibly bring him as well).
I can't eat all of the black cherry jam because he may want some too.
I can't just pick up and move to a dream job in Bali without discussing it with him first.

Will I lose myself in being part of a unit?  I always highly valued relationship independence - making sure that I had my own friends and interests outside of my boyfriend (now husband).  That concern has especially been at the forefront of my mind because I moved to London for us, to support Mr. Gadget and had a really tough time professionally and emotionally (aka the job market here meant I had to search for a job in my old, not entirely beloved field).  So did I do the right thing for us and for me?

It is a daily process and a series of tough decisions, but at the end it is a resounding yes.  Because I am controlling my today and making peace with that.  Thinking "what if" is a battle you will always lose.

I know I make some decisions differently because of us but they are still my decisions.  The key is to be honest and communicative when I think I start to question them and then prioritize everything that is important to me and us.  So it's a list that is constantly being reviewed and checked.

I'm always keeping that list with me.

After all, I made the ultimate decision when I said "I do".  I chose Mr. Gadget, wanted in on this unit, and am totally happy with it.

But I'm still not doing matching cowboy shirts.